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Believe it or not, there is a natural ingredient from Europe that can help change the way your legs feel and the way you feel about the circulation in your legs. Whether we realize it or not, the circulation in our legs can have a huge influence on how we feel and what we do everyday and perhaps even more so every evening. The comfort level of our legs, or better said, their discomfort level at the end of the day can adversely affect our social life and fitness activities - not to mention adversely affecting our sleep. If our legs felt better perhaps we would find it easier to do the things we'd love to do, but find it so difficult to muster the motivation. As if the way our legs can feel at the end of day isn't challenging enough, the changes in the circulation in our legs as we age can seem even more hopeless and discouraging. Now add to that the seeming conspiracy among fashion designers to have us exposing even larger portions of our aging legs and we have a problem that over 80 million Americans with varicose veins understand all too well. (1). Unfortunately, about half of all American women will develop varicose or spider veins at some point in their lives (2). Not only are they unsightly, these leg problems can also cause significant discomfort. Typically, varicose veins are characterized by bulging, blue, sometimes painful and inflamed veins that appear primarily in the calves and thighs. Spider veins, on the other hand, show up as a web of fine lines that can make your legs look like a road map. While age and heredity play a role in the development of varicose and spider veins, weight gain, pregnancy, menopause and the use of hormone replacement therapy can also trigger these vein problems. Making matters worse, chronic inactivity, standing for long periods of time or habitually crossing your legs can make you more prone to injured veins (2). Conventional treatments include surgical stripping, injecting the veins with a chemical irritant or zapping them with lasers. While these approaches can remove existing varicose or spider veins, they will not prevent new ones from developing, since these high-tech treatments do not address the underlying problem of poor circulation. Worse yet, these procedures can also cause infection, scarring, nerve damage and pain (26). If these radical treatments are not an option for you, you'll be happy to hear that there is a natural approach that not only improves the appearance of these ropy, bulging veins, it also fosters leg health to prevent future problems. Veins Explained To understand how varicose veins develop, you need to know a little bit about how blood moves through the body. Essentially, there are two types of major circulatory vessels in the body: the arteries, which channel blood from the heart to the extremities, and the veins, which bring blood from the extremities back to the heart. Of all the veins in your body, leg veins work the hardest to carry blood back to the heart. To accomplish this difficult task, your legs are equipped with specially designed one-way valves that keep the blood moving in the right direction. As efficiently as these valves work, your legs still fight a constant battle against the natural pull of gravity. If the veins can't move the blood efficiently or the one-way valves that prevent the blood from backwashing fail to close properly, blood collects in the legs. This pooling of blood then stretches the vein, causing swelling and injury to the vein's walls (3). Depending on the extent of the enlargement, these veins can show up as either spider or varicose veins. Spider veins are broken capillaries and small veins that appear as jagged red, blue or purple lines on the surface of the skin. While they aren't painful, they can be extremely unattractive. Varicose veins, on the other hand, are thick veins that run deeper beneath the skin. They are far larger and much less attractive than spider veins - and they can make your legs feel fatigued, heavy, achy or even itchy. Varicose veins can also cause burning, throbbing, cramping and restlessness. While these conditions aren't usually dangerous, severe cases can lead to chronic venous insufficiency - a persistent inability of the leg veins to adequately return blood back to the heart (4). Varicose veins are also associated with the development of skin ulcers or a chronic inflammation of a vein - a condition known as phlebitis. Phlebitis is often accompanied by formation of a blood clot, a dangerous situation since the clot can move from the leg vein and travel to the lungs (2). Get a Leg Up with Diosmin Your strategy for battling vein problems naturally is twofold: improving circulation and strengthening the vein walls. The first and simplest measure to improve blood flow is to counteract gravity. Standing or sitting all day makes it harder for blood to move up from the legs and back to the heart. But taking a few minutes to rest with your legs higher than your heart each day allows gravity to help return blood to the heart. Getting in shape can also help relieve varicose and spider veins - and it can even prevent new ones from forming. As we age we lose muscle tone, which adversely affects the health of our legs. Yet adopting a consistent exercise program promotes good circulation and can help to keep our leg muscles, and the blood vessels in our legs, toned. Walking, weight training, low-impact aerobics and swimming strengthen the legs and circulatory system, and help to reduce the throbbing and aching often associated with varicose veins. What you eat can also ease unsightly veins. A low-fat diet filled with fruits, vegetables, beans, legumes and whole grains add key nutrients and fiber to your diet. Eating a fiber-rich diet reduces the chances of constipation which can contribute to varicose veins. Constipation restricts the blood as it returns to the torso through the deep veins in the legs. Straining to have a bowel movement closes off the deep veins in the legs and restricts the flow of blood as it returns to the torso. As the blood backs up, it takes another course through superficial veins, thus the blue streaks in the legs. Eating a fiber-rich diet alleviates and prevents constipation, helping to avoid the damage to the vascular system that can result. In addition to fiber, a diet high in fruits and vegetables also ensures adequate intake of nutrients and phytonutrients, which also help tonify the blood vessels. As a bonus, a healthy diet and exercise program can also jump-start weight loss - an important consideration since carrying too much weight creates extra pressure on your heart and blood vessels, interfering with healthy circulation (2). To strengthen the veins themselves, take a tip from the Europeans. From Austria to France to Italy, women and their doctors have relied on Diosmin for more than 30 years to treat circulatory problems affecting the legs - and with good reason. Diosmin is a unique bioflavonoid derived from citrus fruits and is closely related to other citrus bioflavonoids such as hesperiden, quercetin, and rutin (5). Clinical trials have shown that Diosmin is highly effective in boosting circulation and strengthening the veins in the legs (5). Not only does this improve existing varicose and spider veins, it can also reduce the likelihood of future problems. What makes Diosmin so amazing is its power to specifically target the blood vessels in the legs. Diosmin improves both blood vessel elasticity and microcirculation while relieving pain and inflammation by inhibiting pro-inflammatory prostaglandins and thromboxanes (21,24). Because of its direct action on the integrity of vein walls, Diosmin also reduces the amount of fluid that leaks out of them (21,22). Diosmin's protective benefits do not stop there. Because it is a potent anti-oxidant, Diosmin decreases lipid peroxidation and reduces free radical damage that can undermine vein health (23, 27). In one clinical trial, people who suffered from pain and swelling due to varicose veins experienced significant improvement in their symptoms after taking Diosmin for a few months (6). A review of studies also found that, among more than 5,000 patients with vein disorders, the vast majority not only saw a reduction in their discomfort, they actually saw the swelling in their calves and ankles disappear (7). Across the board, research shows that a daily dose of 500 to 1,000 mg of Diosmin improves the health of leg veins and brings tremendous relief from pain, night cramps and leg heaviness (8,9,10,11). Both short- and long-term use of this highly effective natural ingredient comes without any side effects. It is also so safe that you need not worry about adverse interactions of Diosmin with drugs, foods, lab tests or interactions with diseases or conditions. (5). Help for Hemorrhoids Because Diosmin reduces swelling and bolsters vein health, it can also help people suffering with hemorrhoids - those uncomfortable varicose veins that form in the lower rectum and anus. Along with making it painful to sit, hemorrhoids can itch, bleed or protrude - and almost half of all Americans suffer from them by the time they turn 50 (12). Extensive research conclusively shows that Diosmin can safely alleviate the pain, inflammation and bleeding of hemorrhoids (13,14,15). Best of all, it offers quick relief, often working its magic within a week or two (16). Plus, Diosmin reduces the risk of a relapse (17). Diosmin for Cancer? While no one questions Diosmin's efficacy for treating varicose and spider veins or hemorrhoids, scientists have begun exploring other ways this potent flavonoid may boost health. Their main focus - cancer prevention - especially oral and skin cancers. Researchers haven't conclusively identified the cancer-fighting component in Diosmin, but preliminary experiments show that this flavonoid inhibits the proliferation of cancer cells (18). In two studies pitting Diosmin against other flavonoids like rutin, grapeseed extract and red wine, Spanish investigators found that Diosmin was considerably more effective at reducing the number of metastatic melanoma cells (a potentially deadly type of skin cancer cells that spread through the body) than any of the other flavonoids tested (19,20). Other studies have found that Diosmin puts the brakes on the spread of cancer cells in the mouth (25). Although it could be years before science conclusively proves Diosmin's cancer benefit, this nutrient can't be beat for supporting vein health. Along with taking supplemental Diosmin, there are several simple strategies you can employ to encourage healthy circulation. Eating a high-fiber, anti-oxidant rich diet and getting plenty of exercise can help keep veins in top form. And remember to take a break and put your feet up every now and again. References: 1. American Society for Dermatoloic Surgery. 2. National Women's Health Information Center. U.S. Department of Health & Human Services. 3. American College of Phlebology. 4. Society for Vascular Surgery. 5. Diosmin Monograph. Alternative Medicine Review. 2004;9(3):308-311. 6. Ting AC, et al. Clinical and hemodynamic outcomes in patients with chronic venous insufficiency after oral micronized flavonoids therapy. Vascular Surgery. 2001;35(6):443-447. 7. Ramelet AA. Daflon 500 mg: symptoms and edema clinical update. Angiology. 2005;56 Suppl 1:S25-S32. 8. Bergan JJ. Chronic venous insufficiency and the therapeutic effects of Daflon 500 mg. Angiology. 2005; 56 Suppl 1:S21-S24. 9. Nicolaides AN. From symptoms to leg edema: efficacy of Daflon 500 mg. Angiology. 2003;54 Suppl 1:S33-S44. 10. Smith PC. Daflon 500 mg and venous leg ulcer: new results from a meta-analysis. Angiology. 2005; 56 Suppl 1:S33-S39. 11. Jantet G. Chronic venous insufficiency: worldwide results of the RELIEF study. Reflux assessment and quality of life improvement with micronized Flavonoids. Angiology. 2002;533:245-256. 12. National Institutes of Health. 13. Lyseng-Williamson KA, et al. Micronised purified flavonoids fraction: a review of its use in chronic venous insufficiency, venous ulcers and haemorrhoids. Drugs. 2003;63(1):71-100. 14. Meshikhes AW. Daflon for haemorrhoids: a prospective, multi-centre observational study. Surgeon. 2004;2(6):335-338. 15. Kecmanovic D, et al. PHLEBODIA (diosmine): a role in the management of bleeding nonprolapsed hemorrhoids). Acta Chirurgica Iugoslavica. 2005;52(1):115-116. 16. Diana G, et al. Activity of purified diosmin in the treatment of hemorrhoids. La Clinica Terapeutica. 2000;151(5):341-344. 17. Misra MC, et al. Randomized clinical trial of micronized flavonoids in the early control of bleeding from acute internal haemorrhoids. British Journal of Surgery. 2000;87(12):1732-1733. 18. Browning AM, et al. Flavonoid glycosides inhibit oral cancer cell proliferation - role of cellular uptake and hydrolysis to the aglycones. Journal of Pharmacy and Pharmacology. 2005;57(8):1037-1042. 19. Martinez C, et al. Treatment of metastatic melanoma B16F10 by the flavonoids tangeretin, rutin, and diosmin. Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry. 2005;53(17):6791-6797. 20. Martinez C, et al. The effect of the flavonoids dioxmin, grapeseed extract and red wine on the pulmonary metastatic B16F10 melanoma. Histology and Histopathology. 2005;20(4):1121-1129. 21. Ramelet AA. Clinical benefits of Daflon 500 mg in the most severe stages of chronic venous insufficiency. Angiology. 2001;52 Suppl 1:S49-56. 22. Cyrino FZ, et al. Micronization enhances the protective effect of purified flavonoidsfraction against postischaemic microvascular injury in the hamster cheek pouch. Clinical and Experimental Pharmacology & Physiology. 2004;31(3):159-162. 23. Bergan JJ, et al. Therapeutic approach to chronic venous insufficiency and its complications: place of Daflon 500 mg. Angiology. 2001;52 Suppl 1:S43-7. 24. Katsenis K. Micronized purified flavonoids fraction (MPFF): a review of its pharmacological effects, therapeutic efficacy and benefits in the management of chronic venous insufficiency. Current Vascular Pharamcology. 2005;3(1):1-9. 25. Browning AM, et al. Flavonoid glycosides inhibit oral cancer cell proliferation - role of cellular uptake and hydrolysis to the aglycones. Journal of Pharmacy and Pharmacology. 2005;57(8):1037-1042. 26. National Women's Health Information Center. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office on Women's Health. 27. Villa P, et al. Protective effect of diosmetin on in vitro cell membrane damage and oxidative stress in cultured rat hepatocytes. Toxicology. 1992;73:179-189. real penis enlargment erection penis pill size vimax vimax free penis enlargement exercise penis enargement pills product vigrx penis enlargement pills free pnis enlargement technique penis enlargement device vimax male virility sexual enhancement

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Male to female breast enlargement and enhancement is gaining quite a bit of popularity these days. While it is true that most breast augmentations, whether a natural or surgical method, are performed on women, there are also a number of men desiring male breast enlargement. Many male to female transexuals, female impersonators, cross dressing men, or just men with certain fetishes or special interests seek to enlarge their breasts and make them look and feel like female breasts to improve their self confidence and self image, just like the women who are seeking larger breasts. There is actually almost no difference between male and female breast tissue, except that the balance of estrogenic hormones in a woman's body outnumber a man's, and this is what determines the volume of breast tissue. Men seeking male to female breast enlargement or "shemale" breast enlargement as it has been termed, actually have the same options women do. Those options are male breast augmentation surgery, or a natural male or female breast enhancement pill or system designed to naturally enlarge the male breast by stimulating the body's own hormones and essentially manipulating them to grow new breast tissue by creating a new hormonal balance. While there is a condition in men and young boys, often unwanted, called Gynecomastia, that results in female-like breast development in males, the technology and product development to recreate this natural phenomena in men who actually desire breast growth, has been a little more difficult to harness. It is actually hypothetically and scientifically easier to enlarge women's breasts due to a pre-existing abundance of breast tissue growth-inducing hormones and chemicals. So, if a man wants to grow his breasts to look and feel more like a female's breasts, then what are his natural options? There are a few natural male breast enhancers currently available today that really do work and help men develop breast tissue like a female. These male breast enlargement programs are quickly gaining popularity and recognition in the transgender world as a highly effective, nonsurgical method of growing the male breasts. As with any other natural remedy or supplement, the potential buyer should be aware of any possible allergies or sensitivities they may have to certain herbs or foods. Also, be aware if you are taking a preparation that contains any type of phytoestrogens, as this type of supplement, when combined the male hormonal chemistry, can cause issues with acne, mood swings, and other hormone-related issues. Men can definitely get results from natural male breast enlargement products, they just need to find one that specifically targets the male breast. Success is yours with the right product! guide to penis enlargment natural penis enlargment technique penis enlargment pills do penis enargement pills work easy enlarement free penis surgery way vimax penis enlargement surgery picture penis enlargement herb vig rx store natural penis enargement pills

Cooking Salts Explained Salt, also known as Sodium Chloride or (NaCl) is a vital component of the healthy and balanced human diet. Over half of the human body contains fluids that contain salt. Our blood, tears and saliva all contain salt. In addition we daily lose salt in our perspiration and urine. Muscles need salt in order to function, nerves require salt to carry messages and the digestive system cannot function without salt. So as you can see salt is very important to us humans. Table Salt Table salt is your everyday white granular salt found in most kitchens. It is most commonly mined from salt mines and then refined to remove other minerals until it is pure or close to pure sodium chloride. Often you will find table salt referred to as 'iodized', this term refers to the fact that the manufacturer has added iodine. This practice began in the earlier part of the last century in co-operation with the government to minimise the incidence of thyroid problems such as Goiter; an enlargement of the thyroid gland caused by an iodine deficiency. Taste: Slightly metallic, uninteresting and can easily become overpowering. Rock Salt Rock salt is coarse and is usually mined from ancient salt deposits that are the result of very large bodies of water evaporating and leaving behind huge deposits of rock salt. Rock salt is much less refined than everyday table salt and contains more minerals and often more impurities. Rock salt is good for cooking with and ideal to use in salt grinders. I tend to use rock salt in blanching water as adding salt to water increases its boiling temperature and thus decreases the cooking time. I also use rock salt for presentation purposes such underneath oysters to keep them from falling over and visual appeal. Taste: Rock salt can vary in taste depending on the region it is mined from and can possess interesting characteristics. Sea Salt Sea salt comes in many forms; granules, large crystals and flakes. Sea salt is cultivated from filtered high salt content sea water using a process of evaporation. As the water evaporates salt crystals begin to form, the crystals are then allowed to settle, then removed, drained, dried and ready to use. Sea salt (as well as seafood for that matter) naturally contains iodine and supplementing, as often found in ordinary table salt is not required if sufficient amounts of either constitute part of your diet. I tend not to use salt at the table as I believe if the Chef has done his job there should be no need for the addition of salt. However should a guest request salt I will serve them only pure sea salt flakes. My personal preference for sea salt is that of the English east coast, a region that has been producing beautiful flaky white soft crystals for centuries. Taste: When used in cooking it blends seamlessly with the food. When used at the table it imparts a slight saltiness without the brackishness or lip cringing effect of other salts. A few flakes on the tongue and its oceanic origins become very apparent. Is sea salt worth the extra cost? In my professional and personal opinion, definitely. penis enlagement video penis enlagement pill magna rx guide to penile enlargement penis enhancement excersizes vimax truth about penis enlargement pills pnis enlargement excercises get vigrx free penis elargement technique natural penis enargement pills

We have already looked at what the female orgasm is in other articles, here we are going to look at how you and your partner can achieve satisfying orgasms and enhance your relationship. The conditions must be correct for your partner to achieve orgasm, both partners must be relaxed and in a comfortable setting and feel totally at ease. The feeling of anxiety must not be present, as well as the moods of both partners must be happy and without care. This psychological aspect is somehow as important as the physical ones. Relax and set the mood with foreplay To achieve orgasm, as much foreplay as possible must be performed. In most cases, and where the woman wishes it, cunnilingus is very effective. In fact, if cunnilingus is properly performed the woman will reach an initial orgasm. It should take on the average about 20 minutes. See the net-planet article on cunnilingus for the correct and effective procedures. Do not stop however, as the larger and more important orgasm is yet to come. 3 Positions for great female orgasm There are three positions that almost insure a long and pleasurable female orgasm. Do not attempt any of the three without adequate foreplay (or the cunnilingus as above). The first position has many names, but as mentioned in the Perfumed Garden (a classic Arabic text from the golden age of Arabic Literature), it is called Dok-al-Arz, or “pounding on the spot”. This position assures 3 important factors in copulation. The first is depth of the penis. The second is the “g-spot angle” and the third is maximum clitoral stimulation. To achieve this position the man sits on the edge of the bed, and the woman sits on the man, inserting his penis deeply into her vagina. She then wraps her legs around him, as well as her arms. The couple is free to kiss if desired. Then the woman begins a slow grinding movement (no thrusting is possible). She is able to stimulate simultaneously her clitoris and g-spot. The orgasm comes quickly and with great intensity. Should the man be able to ejaculate into her womb as she is finishing, the result is only intensified. The woman will love the man greatly if performed well. The second position also has a great many names, but is commonly knows as The Gates of Heaven. To perform this The woman lies on her back. The man lies or kneels in alignment with the vagina. The man will hold (or press with his shoulder) the woman's leg(s) upwards to adapt the positioning of the woman's pelvis. This position, as believed by some, achieves a faster and more intense type of female orgasm. This can be accomplished through lifting the women's leg(s) higher upwards; the deeper the man's penis can fully go in. Again, there is both clitoral and g-spot stimulation. Again, there is very little or no thrusting, but a slow and steady grinding movement. If the woman and man can grind in rhythm, the effect is only heightened. The third position is a variation of the second, and is called Crab on its Back. This position, like the previous two assures maximum clitoral and g-spot stimulation. This position allows for some thrusting. The woman lies on her back with a cushion beneath her buttocks, and the man kneels or lies on top of her while pressing her thighs hard against her chest. The vagina will be tighter and the cervix will be pushed forward, so the penis presses against the cervix when thrusting, with a corresponding intensity of sensation. The result is often a very quick and immediate orgasm (or series of orgasms) of the woman. Achieving satisfaction The practicing of these three positions will give you and your partner a lot of pleasure and if done correctly can help her achieve wonderful orgasms to enhance and fulfill your relationship with each other. magna rx pill vimax penis enlargement pic before and after vimax penis enlargement surgeries homemade penile enlargement medical penile enlargment enlargement erection penis pills vimax free penile enlargment pills does vigrx really work natural penis enargement pills

Mid life Crisis is not a disease or an event that one can avoid. It afflicts everyone who lives through their middle years. There is no warning as to when it will hit you, but when it does, it likely will come at the worst possible time, but then again, when is a good time for a meltdown? Most likely your time will differ from that of your friends and others close to you like your Husband or Wife, since our Middle years can begin anytime from our mid thirties through one’s fifties and everyone is different. Don’t even think you can avoid mid life Crisis, because you can’t! No amount of money or influence can get you out of this one. How you endure the transformation and to what degree you suffer or not, will vary as widely as those who experience it. You know the cliché, forewarned is forearmed, so knowing what will happen and how to survive the experience in tact, can go a long way. Right! I may have been exaggerating slightly about how ominous Middle aged Crisis can be, because I wanted to grab your attention. However, we have all heard the jokes about middle aged crisis and know that within all jokes, there does contain a grain of truth. The truth here is that some of you will experience a major shift in your lives, while for others the change may be more gentle. Do not doubt that change is on its way. It is inevitable! You may not have say on if or when it will happen, but you do have a say in how you will deal with it. Each and every one of us is equipped with a silver bullet in our personal arsenal to deploy as we see fit. This is something that you may already be using or something that you have yet to take out. It matters not because you never run out of it. It is the most effective weapon we have and that is Attitude! As a Life Coach, we use our attitude and perspective to help our clients deal with many issues in their lives until their own attitude can take over. In fact, we often say that if we only have one tool to use, Perspective would be it. How you view things, and the attitude you take toward life’s ups and downs, (your perspective), has a dramatic effect on how you cope. Are you a glass is half full or half empty person? Do you laugh in the face of danger or do you run and hide in terror? Are you someone who is afraid of change or do you embrace it like me? Do you see problems or opportunities for improvement? Positive and negative personalities are obviously opposites of each other, with the extremes differing in folks all up and down the spectrum of the pole. I can certainly find folks who exemplify the ends of the pole, those with very strong outlooks, but for those who are fence sitters, you now have an opportunity to change your attitude. Only you know how you experience the world around you, but I know that a positive or negative attitude will affect how you experience what I have coined, The Emergence of our True Self. How would you like to go through life? Seeing opportunities or finding problems everywhere? The choice is yours. Look at this time as an amazing opportunity for you to take a peek behind the veil, the cloak of mystery that is you. Avidly seek out the answers to questions that have plagued mankind since the beginning of time. I know that as a child I lay in bed and many times looked up at the sky and wondered, “Why am I here”? “What is my purpose?” “How can I be more than I am?” These are the questions that will now be answered for you. This is your time to finally solve the mystery. View this time as a positive experience. This is your time and it has been given to you so that you can emerge as your True Self. Feel all of it; embrace the experience, even the tough stuff. Remember the butterfly and its struggle to emerge from it’s cocoon. You may struggle through this time but you will emerge a more content person for it. I am positive about this. Middle Aged Crisis, struck this week and it happened to a man we will call Dan. Let’s see how it begins so we know what to look for. Dan is a slightly paunchy, balding middle-aged man in his late 40’s, whose one attempt of rebellious attitude towards his wife, was to go against her thrifty nature and adorn the front end of his mini van with a ‘bra”! One day, Dan left his ‘bra’ behind and came home wearing a shiny new candy apple red corvette instead. It looks like the van was traded in for this gorgeous sexy rolling piece of penis envy. After the ‘big wow’ fell out of your dropped jaw, was your next thought the same as mine “now there’s a guy whose wife is going to kill him”? Where are the kids going to sit? Is Dan a classic case of a man having a mid life crisis?!” Will his ‘search” for himself end here or will Dan take it a step further? It seems that several of the guys in Dan’s office have traded their wives of 3o years for 30 yr.old wives. We don’t know if Dan knows any 30 yr; old women so we will have to wait and see about that. Dan seems to be the poster boy for Middle Aged Men in crisis but what about woman? Are they immune to mid life angst and do men and woman manifest their symptoms in the same way? Joan Rivers and her G-force facelift might be the perfect example of a woman who is still searching for more in her life but can’t get past her mirror. We often joke about woman and their hot flashes, but do they wake up all sweaty and then head out in the morning to buy sexy cars or is there another measure of being unsatisfied they go for? I have a few lady friends who were the very last women in the world I EVER expected to radically deviate from their MOM role. It seemed at 40 something, they woke up one day and traded their beautifully decorated home, mommy and wifely duties for a basement apartment and freedom. Did it mean they loved their children less? Nope, it just meant that they were compelled to find out who they were after being a mom and wife. Yes, a few became what is commonly referred to today as Cougars, woman who prey on younger men, but for the most part, they seemed to be genuinely seeking themselves. Either this was something that was lost, or something they never had in the first place. So is Mid life Crisis a valid condition or an excuse to be selfish and make up for poor choices along the way? Is it a human condition that we will all experience in varying degrees as we pass through their middle ages, or is it reserved for those who share certain personality traits? Is it possible that it is related to female menopause or male Andropause? Do hormones have anything to do with the ‘stress and distress of those in the eye of this storm? Are these people as out of control as they sometimes seem to be? I am not a doctor and do not know the answer to these questions but I do know as a Life Coach and a woman in her middle years, that there seems to be a great many people in this age category who are seeking and searching for something that will fill a part of them that is missing. They have a great desire for something more in their life, but what that MORE is they don’t know. It is a time of personal reflection and for some breaking out of a mold that has held them for many years. Perhaps you know someone who has quit their executive position or walked out on their 30 year marriage. It doesn’t always make sense, this behaviour, but there is common theme. CHANGE! It seems that many are seeking their destiny, and the meaning of life. They want to know what their purpose is and where they fit into the Grand Scheme. They want to know what this thing called LIFE is all about, and they are seeking their soul, their soul mates and questioning long held beliefs. Spirituality is a common theme, and many search for their connection to something larger than the known world and for answers they go to the Unknown world A metamorphosis is taking place and I see it as our third great struggle of life. The first is being born, the second is adolescence and now this time I will coin, The Emergence of Self. The emergence because it is our true self we are seeking. Not the daughter, son, mother, father, doctor, cook or any other label we have put on ourselves, but OUR true SELF , our true soul, the nature of who we really are. It seems this is a time where anything can happen and does. Sometimes those who are most surprised by what happens next are the seekers themselves. As adolescents we go through the change together, it is expected, so resources are in place to help us deal with it. Our families and teachers are there for us, supporting the change. Now in our mid 40’s- 50’s, it seems we face this change alone. No longer are our buddies, families or teachers there to support us. In fact, it may be that those closest to you don’t understand why you are contemplating the things you are. They may argue that you are making a big mistake and you don’t know what you are doing. Even if this is true, and in many cases it is, there doesn’t seem to be anything to do about it except ride it out. Have you ever wondered at the timing of all this? Why is it so important to KNOW right now? Why upset the apple cart at this stage of your life? Perhaps it is so that our time here is not wasted in the larger sense. Many of us as children had a dream or a goal. I think that this first memory may be the truth of who we really are and why we are here. How many of us have stayed true to who we were? I know that there have been many times in my life that duty as a daughter, a mother, and even a wife have taken precedence over who I wanted to be. So maybe this frustration, this time of wanting is really the only way to help us break the chains of ‘good behaviour’ and allows us the time to search for our lost selves or if you believe in the metaphysical then perhaps we are waking up to what brought us here in the first place, our contract or mission. Have you felt that there is a master plan but you haven’t been let in on the details? The there is a great secret, albeit unknown to you, and almost like a cosmic joke, it is at your expense. Why does this transformation take place? Is there a way of escaping it? I think not. It seems to me a natural progression to a higher state of being if we are lucky. It seems we all go through the process, albeit at slightly different ages and degrees of angst. I believe that this is one “Crisis” that is supposed to happen and rather than describe it as a crisis we could rename it as a transformation. We have all have known a “Dan”, a 50 something guy who finally buys his corvette, or his Harley, leaves his wife or leaves his job- any or all of these are fairly common and classic crisis behaviour. As I said earlier, Women are not immune either. We can all envision the Cougar, a woman in her mid to late 40’s who used to be Suzy Homemaker and is now on the prowl for a 2o something guy to make up for her boring life. On the outside, this behaviour seems selfish and I suppose in some ways it is. But remember, this Emergence is about self and change and change never comes easily. There is always a struggle and in this instance, doing what is opposite in nature of what one has always been done may be one of the catalysts to the next step. These folks are in the midst of a chemical and physical transformation. Alchemy is taking place. When all is said and done, they will be different. They are reaching out for their world to make sense and hopefully when all is said and done, they will have found peace. Peace within themselves and peace with their outside world. We know that these folks want more, but and the sexy car, younger mate is not the whole answer because change on the outside does not equate with change on the inside. I feel that this transformation may actually be harder on us than adolescence. When we are young, we have out parents to support us. We walk en mass with our friends to school and we are all going through stuff together. But mid life, we do that one by ourselves and many times, we wreak havoc on the lives of those we love the most. This change, this metamorphosis, cannot likely be stopped, anymore that you can stop breathing, but for some, it comes with great cost. Our bodies change- we don’t child bear anymore. We have wrinkles and grey hairs sprouting from places they aren’t supposed too. Our skin on our hands begin to thin and become translucent, showing the blue of our veins. We fear we are losing our sexuality, our vitality and our ability to be ‘seen’ as one of the players. We fear this invisibility and we fight to be more than we are, because we want to stay in the game. We also know that we are more than we are showing. We wake to an unknown dream or assignment and strive to fulfill our life’s mission, but the guide book is missing. The map is gone and our hands flail in the wind seeking something solid to grip onto. It’s a turbulent time until one day, you wake up and your life begins to make sense again. You start to realize what is important. Who you are and what you are passionate about. You know what you love and whom you love and you have a sense of the greater picture. You know why you are here. You understand your ties to the past and what you bring to the future. The Emergence of Self will happen whether you plan for it or not. At some point in your life mid life, an amazing discovery of self will take place, and I hope that you complete your transformation all the way until you feel at peace within your heart and the world around you. For those of you who are wondering what signs to look for or if you are currently experiencing your transformation, below you can find a list of common features: Typical features of mid-life include: Experiencing healthy dissatisfaction……..yearning for more…..is this it?? What worked before no longer rocks your world. The changing body becomes your guide. You get used to uncertainty You want to give back You become much more than you thought you were. Your values change significantly You are getting a hefty whiff of you own mortality. The emergence of wisdom Mid-life challenges that Coaching can assist with: • Finding your Passion • Removing FEAR from the Change Process • Learning how to acknowledge and accept others • Learning to Communicate at heart level • Reconnect with your SELF • Leaving Guilt Behind • Trusting your instincts • Creating a vision