vigrx pills
Most of the questions asked to sexual health experts are about men's early ejaculations and women's orgasm troubles. When you read this you may say: It's normal, if man is coming off quickly, woman couldn't have an orgasm! But if you really think for a few seconds, surprisingly, you won't see any relation between these two events. Because, a man if he is not a boor, will prepare his woman to reach her orgasm before his ejaculation.
The other highly popular question is about the penis size! After all that porn movies many people are really confused. How and where to find such a prominent organ? What is the normal size? How thick and long can be the biggest? How small is acceptable for lovemaking?
Every man's genital is different as his finger print and the role of the penis size in a happy and successful sexual relationship is not such important. At least you don't have to be such stupid to pay sack full money to programs, drugs or advice for making it bigger! Even with a huge organ a man's chance is very limited to make her achieve an orgasm if he is not a good lover and doesn't know proper sex techniques, most probably he will cause pain instead of pleasure.
Even a man who has a miniscule dick may be a perfect lover! The only way is to learn how to make better love, how to be a better partner, instead of being paranoiacly distressed. This is normal and this is your body, love it and try to use it more creatively and with more love. Kiss and caress every part of your partner's body for long time, arouse her enough, and go down and give her a nice oral love... until she reaches the climax.
Believe me, every woman loves and prefers such a talented lover in the place of a big dick entering a few times into your vagina before spurting out and then sleeping in his side as nothing happened! Naturally!
Having a small organ is not a guilt, a crime, if he knows his body and has developed many better solutions he is absolutely a CLEVER man and a perfect lover!
In regard to early ejaculations... This, also, is not a crime and if the man has not an organic disorder, may be corrected with some effort. But many men, instead of paying attention to their situation, act like early coming off doesn't make any difference in their sex life! Which may be true!
Actually you may consider the natural disharmony between two genders. Men, by their nature, want to thrust into a hole when aroused and squirt in, that's all! But woman needs a prior preparation, a foreplay of at least 10-15 minutes to be concentrated and ready for insertion.
One woman likes this position, another may choose that position, many women request clitoris stimulation besides men's thrusting... Many fatiguing services asked from men! And furthermore, if a serious and passionate relationship doesn't exist between partners, men are really exhausted in the bed. Is a natural error, an innate lack of harmony exists between men and women?
Let see some different type of early comers:
Type A: The worst. He doesn't even know he is an early comer. When he likes, he takes the woman under him and ejaculates. He doesn't care anything else! For the woman's orgasm? What is that? He hasn't heard anything about woman's orgasm!
Type B: He knows about woman's orgasm but act like he doesn't know. Same of the Type A, he pulls the woman under and he comes off, the only difference, if by mistake or pain, woman makes a weak sound like "ah" he will suppose she reached an orgasm but for his comfort, he will never ask her the truth!
Type C: He knows his disorder, he is sad and wants to visit a doctor but he is shamed or can't find the time to go! As a foreplay he kiss and caress her a little but he can't wait and comes off. Sometimes he can't even find times to thrust his dick into her. He is sad but life goes on!
Type D: He is aware of his early ejaculation disorder but he also knows his partner's orgasm right! So, he will kiss and caress her at great length, give her a great oral love and bring her to an orgasm. Then start to make love for himself and he comes off. Because his partner reached orgasm before his quick ejaculation there is no trouble. Partners are relaxed and happy!
That means, if a man is understanding and clever the early ejaculation is not an important obstacle on the way of a happy sexual relationship. Man may visit a doctor and try to find the main reason behind this disorder and get a treatment which is totally normal, but meantime he is kind and not selfish, gives her ultimate pleasures to reach her orgasm.
An absolutely good sex for a woman is a normal dick size, a foreplay at length, long kisses and caresses, staying inside her long enough with many thrusting, knowing her favorite positions and giving her the best pleasures... not insisting on what he wants, but understanding her and giving her what she needs to get her climax.
Please remember that if she has reached to one orgasm in her entire life, she knows the best position for her, and an intelligent man never insists on a new position which may cause a lack of concentration, he will follow her orientations.
Finally, what is the woman's responsibility in creating a harmonious sexual relationship? Women must talk and describe what they want clearly. Of course talking to the boors will not produce a positive result but intelligent men may understand your needs. Do not imitate orgasm or do not keep silent and sleep... talk to your lovers and kindly explain your desires, if not you will lose your sexual desires and even you won't be able to masturbate and get orgasm by yourself in the future!
enlargement forum free matter penis size penis elargement pic pnis enlargement traction device natural penis enargement penis enlagement cream herbal pnis enlargement pills do pnis enlargement pills work best penis enlargement surgery
vigrx pills
Unsatisfactory Sex-Life...is an Important Reason for People to Go For “Extra-Marital Relations” or “Divorces”
Introduction
In a Country where using the word “Sex” itself is a big taboo; where anyone talking anything below belt is consider as a “Character Less” person, how can one talk about “ Love Making”? I agree that ours is a country which gave to this world “the art of love making” through pictorial presentation of “KAMASUTRA” but we still hesitate and feel shy, when one is asked to explain those positions. Just look into your “Sex Life” and see if what you are doing in “Love Making” or it is just a “Lust”? Are you having “fun” while making-love or you are just “inviting in” or “inserting in” as “fire” there is not bearable?
This article is prepared with the inputs from 467 people across the country and out-of them around 287 where females and among them 261 had experienced “Love-Making”. Most of these ladies did mentioned that in their married life...it is just “Roll-on; Roll-Off and Sleep”. There is no doubt that “Physical Relations” are important for the long-lasting “love-relations” between couple. Unsatisfactory Sex Life can lead to “Extra-Marital Relations” or “Divorces”. Lets discuss about it. Why “Love-Making” is important? What is the importance of “Foreplay” is satisfactory “Love Intercourse”. After the game is over, what is that a male or female expects from each other? And things like that. Lets being with “KAMASUTRA”.
History...behind KAMASUTRA
The KAMASUTRA history leads us back to the ancient India, between the 1st and 6th centuries (although the exact year of its writing still unknown). Considered by many specialists as the most important and influent book on the human sexuality, the KAMASUTRA (which was actually written by Vatsyayana, a scholar on Indian traditions) is today commonly mistaken as a plain and simple compendium of sex positions, or a manual to the art of sex. Other than that, the KAMASUTRA is a real document of an important part of Indian customs and traditions, showing many thoughts and ideas that still fit in our today's society values.
There are, indeed, descriptions and paintings of sex positions on the original KAMASUTRA. The author Vatsyayana regarded lovemaking as being much more than physical encounter, but also an important spiritual act of love and learning, a "divine union" as the author refers on the book. He considered that there were only eight possible sex positions, multiplied by eight. The total amount of 64 sex positions being called "The 64 Arts".
However, only about 20% of the KAMASUTRA was dedicated to sex positions, and the rest is in fact a compendium on insights about the relationships between men and women and in the ancient India's social and religious life.
The KAMASUTRA only reached the Eastern civilization in 1883, thanks to Sir Richard Burton, who wrote the first English translation for the book. Since then, other two key translations from the original KAMASUTRA in Sanskrit were made: one in 1970 by Indra Sinha and the most recent one by Wendy Doniger in 2002. However, we may find plenty of "unofficial" translations focusing only on the sex positions (and including several positions not listed on the original), specially on the Internet. Most of these versions have little in common with the original KAMASUTRA.
KAMASUTRA in its true Sense
For many people – especially in the Western world - KAMASUTRA is merely a collection of different love-making positions, a combination of acrobatics and pornography. But for the Eastern mind, the true meaning of KAMASUTRA reaches beyond this purely physical interpretation. For them, sex – in all of its forms - is sacred. It reproduces the ultimate creative act, the union of the masculine and the feminine cosmic principles. Sex is the cause of the creation and manifestation of the universe. According to Tantra, sexual intercourse, however trivial it may seem, is sacred, cosmic (even when the lovers do not acknowledge this fact, which is usually the case).
When doing the asanas (the yoga positions adopted for the ritual), tantra seeks to "divinize" the couple and their sexuality. Without this spiritual element, KAMASUTRA and Koka Shastrano wouldn't evoke divine rituals.
These two treatises aim to increase sensual voluptuousness. To this end, they propose several sex techniques, with a focus on love-making positions. In fact, the asanas, or traditional positions for joint meditation, are specific and scarce.
Tao teachers have chosen the most comfortable positions for prolonging intercourse, sometimes even up to two hours without having to move much, for this would hinder interiorization during divine intercourse. They are usually so comfortable that complete physical and mental relaxation is achieved, and alternative consciousness levels, or even sleep, can be reached. The asanas must also favor magnetic interchange of vital energy, and facilitate control over ejaculation and the body's health.
Tantra dismisses (at least at the beginning) the most common position used in the Western world - the so-called "missionary position" (Uttana bandka in Sanskrit), in which the man lies over the woman. This position is rejected by Tao followers because it does not facilitate control.
Famous Love-Making Positions
Genital Sex:
-Missionary Sex Position: The most famous and common position: man on top and woman at the bottom, with her legs spread, there is direct penetration;
-Feet on his shoulders Sexual Position: While man is kneeling, the woman rests her legs on his shoulders;
From Behind:
-Leapfrog Sex Position: It looks like the doggy position, but here, the woman's torso is lower;
-Spread-Eagle Sex Position: While the woman is laid and facing down, the man must be on top;
Woman on Top:
-Cowgirl Sexual Position: With the man lying down on his back, the woman sits on top facing him;
-Reverse Cowgirl Sex Position: The same as above, but in this position the woman faces away;
Sitting and Kneeling: -Black Bee Sexual Position: The man sits on the floor with her hands behind him. The woman sits on top, with her hands on his shoulders;
-Watching the Game Sex Position: Man sits in a chair and the woman sits on top of him, face-to-face;
Standing: -Wheelbarrow Sexual Position: The woman must be lifted by something, so the man penetrates her, standing;
-Stand and Carry Sex Position: While the man, standing, holds the woman, she wraps her legs around his waist and holds on his shoulders.
What is Foreplay and what is its importance in “Satisfactory” Love-Making
Foreplay consists of sexually stimulating activities that usually lead to intercourse. Since it generally takes women longer to physically become ready for intercourse, foreplay is important in ensuring that the female partner will find lovemaking as satisfying as the male. As foreplay intensifies and a woman becomes increasingly sexually excited, she experiences physiological changes: The labia gradually become swollen and turn a deeper color of pink, the vagina secretes a lubricating fluid that makes insertion of the penis easier, and her nipples harden. For a man, foreplay generally strengthens an erection and increases the urge to have intercourse and ejaculate.
Some Basic Techniques Considered as Foreplay are :
Kissing and deep kissing on the mouth and across the body
Stroking the erogenous zones
Fondling the breasts
Nipple stimulation and sucking
Sensual massage
Frottage (rubbing) and digital manipulation of genitals
Oral sex
Strip tease
Lap dance
Body painting
Showering together
Use of vibrators and other sex toys
There is no time limit to foreplay. And some couples routinely engage in foreplay that does not lead to intercourse and ejaculation. However, most consider foreplay the appetizer and intercourse the main course.
In any relationship where sex is involved, foreplay can be almost as important as if not necessary for the actual sex act to occur. Technically I think of foreplay as any activity that occurs as a precursor to the sex act that has the intent of increasing the level of excitement in your partner and yourself or for preparing one another for the sex act.
After discussing about “KAMASUTRA”...”Various Positions involved” in love-making...and importance of “Foreplay” ...lets share what male or female want from each other...after sexual intercourse
Most of the people just sleep over without even asking their partners as how they feel or what they want. As a result they feel dejected and hurt. So, what males like after sex?
After asking many a man what he likes to do after making love, taking a nap topped the list by a landslide, and having a snack came in at second. Now, in a man's ideal world, every woman would get up after lovemaking, prepare a warm snack for her man and then stroke his hair while he takes a long nap. And although there are women out there who do comply with such a request, chances are it won't become the post-sex routine you're hoping for. It just ain't going to happen. Relationships are about give and take, and while giving her an orgasm and taking a nap fit the rhetoric, that's not the way it's going to be.
Recent statistics released by the University of Chicago also reveal an important fact: Married men, and not their single counterparts, are the most physically and emotionally fulfilled when it comes to sex. They say that the feelings of sharing have never been stronger than in the moments that follow sex.
Which isn't to say that both men and women don't complain of spouses who get out of bed too quickly to wash up, or go back to chores, or turn on the TV, or roll over and fall asleep. They just want to talk about each other...not about their kids or relatives etc. It should both of them.
For many men, the loss of an erection after sex can also beckon the loss of a bond, a shrinking and even shirking away. Want some useless words of advice? Try not to take it personally. If your husband's haste to jump out of bed upsets you, therapists recommend looking at the act of lovemaking as a process that can start as early as dressing for dinner and not conclude until you're both emotionally ready to end your intimacy. The word postcoital implies there's something that happens before and something that happens after, and that there is an it. All there is is a whole.
Now, what is that a female want after “Sexual Intercourse”? I can't pretend to know what every single one wants after sex. The desires range from cuddling and talking to being left alone and being fed. But from what I could gather, touching definitely topped the list.
They want to cuddle. It's no secret; just about every woman loves it when her man finishes doing his thing only to flip her around and hug her in the spoon position. That's the goldmine of affectionate actions. Flipping her around isn't even necessary, but chances are that some kind of bodily touching may be. Why? Well, because sharing in a very sacred experience with a woman likely leaves her feeling vulnerable. And something as small as wrapping your arm around her can make all the difference.
They want to talk. Although many guys aren't big fans of the "cuddle," there are even less men around who want to talk once the deed is over. But if she wants to talk, you may have to keep your ears open and listen up. Chances are that she will likely talk about what went down -- especially if you had her yelling out like a banshee. And I'm quite sure that your "stork able" ego will overtake your need for some shuteye when it comes to such a topic anyway.
She may pamper you by saying, “Let's do it again”. If she's still raring to go after the first round, chances are she'll be all over you, doing her best to let you know that the evening call for a second round. Between playing with herself and stroking your penis, you may just find yourself going into round two before you know it. But if you're older and more comfortable in your relationship, chances are that you may not be as easily aroused for round two, and, of course, that isn't your fault. Add that to the fact that you probably did all the work and it's quite possible that your little man won't be good to go right away.
Conclusion
“Love-Making” is a process. There is a beginning...there is Delivery and then there is an end. More than “just” physical, it is an emotional bonding. And let me tell you, if people are going for “Extra-Marital Relations” one of the main reason for that is “Unsatisfactory” Sexual Relations. Even law says that unsatisfactory “sex relations” is a valid reason for divorce. You can make your love life interesting and enjoyable...you just need “imagination” or “innovation”.
Have a “enjoyable” and “fun filled” life. Always be together and love each other.
Looking forward to your comments and feedback.
With lots of love and care
free natural penis enlargment safe penis enargement penis enlagement photo best penile enlargement surgery penis enlargment picture does pnis enlargement work free penis elargement tip free pennis enlargement vigrx pills
Non-surgical breast enhancement and herbal breast enhancement products are fast becoming a real and effective breast enlargement alternative for women who either don’t want the artificial look and feel of breast implants, cannot afford the surgery, do not want to take the risk, or simply have never even considered having cosmetic surgery to correct or enhance any physical feature they are not satisfied with.
There are actually quite a few mediocre herbal breast enhancement products on the market today, mostly sold online or in herbal supplement shops, so a buyer must be prudent in shopping around for quality. Non-surgical breast enhancement alternatives can be in the form of a device (like Brava or other breast suction devices), which are worn kind of like a large bra and must be used several times a day or for several hours. Herbal breast enhancement products ( Examples of these products can be found here Breast Enhancement Pills Info,which generally use phytoestrogen or plant estrogen synthesis technology to stimulate the mammary glands and promote breast tissue growth), natural breast growth promotion supplements (non-phytoestrogen), and even hypnosis are other forms of non-surgical breast enhancement gaining popularity as alternatives to surgery.
Herbal breast enhancement products like Bloussant, Erdic and the like, use phytoestrogen technology to boost breast growth. The only problem with traditional herbal breast enhancement products like this is that sometimes the effects may not last, due to a sudden spike in the body’s estrogen, and the subsequent release of the estrogen gained during the usage of the product results in loss of some of or all of the breast tissue growth once the supplement is discontinued. There is actually a non-surgical breast enhancement product that does produce permanent breast growth and maintenance, due to the fact that it does not use traditional herbal phytoestrogen utilization, but rather induces permanent breast growth by stimulating the body’s own pituitary gland and continuing the breast growth cycle that was stunted.
Not only that, but if you do not adhere to a proper lifestyle and diet, some women can experience weight gain, increased cellulite, acne breakouts, and other hormonally induced problems on traditional herbal breast enhancement products, due to a high concentration of estrogenic compounds. The female body is not designed to handle such an influx of estrogen, even if it is plant derived. So please be mindful and ask questions of the manufacturer if you are considering a traditional phytoestrogenic herbal breast enhancement product - make sure it has just the right balance of estrogenic compounds, not an over-abundance of them.
Common complaints with the non-surgical breast enhancement “breast suction devices” like the Brava breast enhancer system, are that they may irritate skin, are bulky and hard to conceal, require too much time to gain any kind of results, and are high in cost and a burden to maintain due to the required physician supervision. The Brava system has proven to be effective in several cases though, but it does take a large time commitment, and patience with the process and work that goes along with it.
Other non-surgical breast enhancers like hypnosis are a little harder to pin down. I haven’t actually read of any success stories with hypnosis for breast enhancement and enlargement, but that certainly doesn’t mean there haven’t been some women who have achieved permanent breast tissue growth. I would approach this method of breast enhancing with extreme caution and suspicion. As with any other non-surgical breast enhancement product, do your research, be prepared for any possible side effects, and know the company’s success rate by researching complaints on the internet or through other resources.
Herbal breast enhancement and non-surgical breast enhancement is becoming the focus of a lot of attention, both positive and negative, and is also the subject of much contention and controversy amongst the medical community. The fact is, there are proven and highly successful alternatives to surgical breast enhancement and enlargement, you just need to know where to look!
penis enlagement surgery photo penile enlargment surgeon penile enlargement photo penis elargement surgery picture penile enlargment pic before and after penis elargement surgery photo medical penis enlagement prosolution penis enlarement pills vigrx pills
Drug Uses Levitra is an oral therapy for the treatment of erectile dysfunction.
How Taken Levitra comes as a tablet to take by mouth. It should be taken as needed about 1 hour before sexual activity. Some form of sexual stimulation is needed for an erection to occur with Levitra. Levitra should not be taken more than once a day. Levitra can be taken with or without food.
Warnings/Precautions Before taking Levitra, tell your doctor if you currently have or have ever had a heart attack, stroke, irregular heartbeats, angina (chest pain), or congestive heart failure; have high or low blood pressure; have a personal or family history of a rare heart condition known as prolongation of the QT interval (long QT syndrome); have liver problems; have kidney problems; have ever had blood problems, including sickle cell anemia, multiple myeloma, or leukemia; have a bleeding or blood clotting disorder; have a stomach ulcer; a family history of degenerative eye disease (e.g., retinitis pigmentosa); or have a physical deformity of the penis such as Peyronie's disease. You may not be able to take Levitra, or you may require a dosage adjustment or special monitoring during treatment if you have any of the conditions listed above. Although Levitra is not indicated for use by women, it is in the FDA pregnancy category B. This means that Levitra is not expected to be harmful to an unborn baby. Levitra should not be taken by women. It is not known whether Levitra passes into breast milk. Levitra should not be taken by women. If you are over 65 years of age, you may be more likely to experience side effects from Levitra. Your doctor may prescribe a lower dose of the medication.
Missed Dose Levitra is used as needed, so you are not likely to miss a dose.
Possible Side Effects The most common side effects with Levitra are: -Headaches -Flushing -Stuffy or runny nose Levitra may uncommonly cause: An erection that will not go away (priapism). If you get an erection that lasts more than 4 hours, get medical help right away. Priapism must be treated as soon as possible or lasting damage can happen to your penis including the inability to have erections. Vision changes, such as seeing a blue tinge to objects or having difficulty telling the difference between the colors blue and green. These are not all the side effects of Levitra. For more information, ask your doctor or pharmacist.
Storage Store at 25�C (77�F); excursions permitted to 15-30�C (59-86�F). Keep Levitra and all medicines out of the reach of children.
Overdose Seek emergency medical attention if an overdose is suspected. Symptoms of a Levitra overdose are not known, but are likely to include chest pain, back pain, dizziness, an irregular heartbeat, abnormal vision, and swelling of the ankles or legs.
More Information Do not take Levitra if you: -Take any form of medication known as "nitrates" (type of medicine used to relieve chest pain that can occur as a result of heart disease). Taking Levitra in combination with nitrates may result in serious side effects. -Take medicines called "alpha-blockers" (sometimes prescribed for prostate problems or high blood pressure). Taking Levitra with alpha-blockers may drop your blood pressure to an unsafe level. -Your doctor determines that sexual activity poses a health risk for you. You have a known sensitivity or allergy to any component of Levitra. The use of Levitra offers no protection against sexually transmitted diseases. Counseling of patients about protective measures necessary to guard against sexually transmitted diseases, including the Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV), should be considered.
Disclaimer This drug information is for your information purposes only, it is not intended that this information covers all uses, directions, drug interactions, precautions, or adverse effects of your medication. This is only general information, and should not be relied on for any purpose. It should not be construed as containing specific instructions for any particular patient. We disclaim all responsibility for the accuracy and reliability of this information, and/or any consequences arising from the use of this information, including damage or adverse consequences to persons or property, however such damages or consequences arise. No warranty, either expressed or implied, is made in regards to this information.
herbal penis enhancement pro solution pills side effects vimax free penis enlargement pills semenax vig rx compare penis enlargement pill pnis enlargement pump free penis enlarement pills penis enlargment before and after vigrx pills
Sigmund Freud, the father of Psychiatry, said that men had a sexual thought consciously or subconsciously every 3 seconds. He timed it like a racehorse when he wasn’t busy having sexual relations with his mother. Psychiatrists go to school for 22 years, subject themselves to years of Psychotherapy, then sit while you ramble and beg for advice for 45 minutes, only to say at the end, “What do you think? I’m afraid our time is up for this week.” You could go insane merely from their torture tactics.
Obviously penis size matters to a woman. Penises range in size from 1’ to 14” on men. The longer and wider and harder the penis, the more friction is created, the deeper the penetration, and the more likely the woman is to achieve vaginal orgasm. However other things are more important to a woman, such as extended foreplay, clitoral stimulation to orgasm, g spot stimulation to orgasm, and length of time after intercourse before the man hails a cab, generally anywhere from 5 to 7 minutes on average.
Size definitely matters to women, but it matters far more to men. Penis envy is not a female phenomenon despite the ravings of the incestuous Dr. Freud. Penis envy is a male phenomenon. Envying the length and width of the black penis is at the root of the Klu Klux Klan, says Mariah Carey. According to research done at Heidelberg University, it is a scientific fact that the purchases of Corvettes and BMW’s are inversely proportional to the length of a man’s penis. Men think that if they have an expensive fancy car then women will think that they are financially successful and will date them, leading other men to think that they are stacked.
The basic theme of any male Rap song and video is always the same. “I am the coolest most hung baddest dude in town and I can ride you all night long.” This is always backed up by half naked stunning harem women slithering around the artist. The lack of a white boxing champion for the past 75 years since Rocky Marciano, has led white men to flock to seven sequels of the Rocky movie. Rocky is now coming out of retirement, the “Italian Stallion”, for a rematch against Kanye West, who has been paid 5 million dollars to take a dive in the fifth, to soothe the wounded egos of male White America, and that’s what it’s all about anyway, “Ego”.
The Ego is the part of the brain that either says in your mind, “I am wonderful”, or “I am garbage.” The “Id” is the part of your brain that says “I want food, water, sex etc.” The Ego is what causes men to desire multiple partners endlessly through cyber dating, because once a woman gives in, no matter how beautiful she is, no matter how loving and caring, she has now lost the ability to give to the man the thing he wants most to boost his Ego, that initial conquest, that triggers in the man’s mind, “I am great, I conquered her.” Men need this to compensate for wounded Egos received at the hands of their insecure fathers, because criticism and control make the father feel great, to compensate for their own reality, unfulfilled wives due to their tiny narrow limp phallus. This is the root cause of the male mid life crisis, leading to divorce and insecure offspring because the male now needs a young wife the same way that he needs a Corvette. Have you ever noticed the shape of a Corvette?
This would all be bad enough but size issues are at the root of male competitiveness in both sports and war. Kim Jong Il, the mini me leader of North Korea has a stable of gorgeous young blonde American women, to make up for his tiny thang. “That’s all you got, baby?” Those words led to the swift execution of a one hit wonder American Diva who was all into the Grace Kelly thing. This would be bad enough, but the development of nuclear weapons and the verbal bravado of this midget against the United States is directly linked to the madman midget’s size insecurity. Ironically midgets are generally very well endowed in proportion to their body size, and this is why they have such confidence. A well known self confidence building mantra used extensively by the Moonies, is “My rooster is huge and hard, and I can ride you all night long.” The problem has become so bad, that erectile dysfunction has become the third leading growth industry worldwide, and men are running for medication named after the enormous gushing of the massive powerful power generating Niagara Falls, even knowing that it causes a rare but pervasive form of blindness.
Martha Stewart has a solution for this insecurity problem which is now leading us all into the Apocalypse, the sudden violent end of all life on Earth forever. The Christian people are eagerly constructing and waiting for the Apocalypse, so that when it comes, after about 30 seconds, they can all say as One, “Look, we were right!” This need to be right, and this unbearable pain of being wrong, is a direct result of penis insecurity.
Martha’s solution is that all men be forced to wear their bag and their bone on their foreheads, for all to see, to instantly put an end to all the b/s and bluffing leading us all into the nuclear inferno. Oprah seconds the motion. She has the most to lose, according to Dr. Phil, the bald barking know it all with the 3 inch penis. Our modern Dr. Freud wears a sock folded in his pants to hide his shortcomings. Maybe an international naked at work day is the answer for saving life on earth. Maybe the Apocalypse won’t be that bad. At least it will put an end to the zillions of Erectile Dysfunction (medications for 1 inch shriveled up things that refuse to stand up no matter how much kiddy porn the man watches) emails in our email boxes. How do these snake oil salesmen get our addresses anyways? Why aren’t they all blind yet? The insecurity disease has now spread to women rushing for breast implants, and to the male obsession with increasing their Google Page Ranking. Have you ever noticed the graphic that Sergey Brin and Larry Page use to display that ranking? They didn’t become zillionaires at 32 by being oblivious to the male fixation with size now, did they?
